Tf2 The War Eagle
The Ticket Boy is a community-created cosmetic item for the Scout.It replaces the Scout's default shirt with a gray, short-sleeved dress shirt, a team-colored buttoned up vest with three golden buttons and a team-colored bow tie tied around the shirt's collar. Team Fortress 2 The War Eagle The appearance of items in the individual listings may vary slightly from the one above. For example, items could have custom names, descriptions, or colors.
Team Fortress 2 (often abbreviated as TF2) is a class based, war-themed, hat and dress-up simulator for the PC, Linux,. Originally, it was a faithful recreation of the original Quake and Half-Life mod, Team Fortress Classic, but has since evolved from its original design into a pointless virtual, where players now must hoard every cosmetic item they can, by any means necessary, in order to inflate their egos and show off their. The 'skill' term that was present around this game before hats arrived, was transformed into a substandard concept by the majority of delusional idiots who do not only believe 'skill' now defines the volume of your virtual wardrobe and not your concrete in-game talent but actually consider that any and all skilled players are 'hackers' who should be 'reported' and/or voted off the server. The original point of the game revolved around cookie-cutter first-person shooter gimmicks, such as capture the flag (aka ), deathmatch (Arena, now defunct) and capturing control points (by Scout rushing every map). Now all this is nothing more than a small minigame to pass the time with, while players wait for more weapons and 'rare' items to magically drop into their inventory. Players lost interest in playing the actual game and they spend most of their time doing fuck all on dilapidated and modified web-hosted servers.
It was once played and cherished by many gamers; however, the game has changed drastically since it became free-to-play on June 23rd, 2011. Nowadays, the game is only played by the biggest faggots that you could possibly imagine,. Unlike other Source games, Team Fortress 2 failed to be an eSport, simply because never really cared about it in the first place, the community is brain dead and the game itself is a heap of shit.
ScoutThe Scout claims to have come from, and while growing up, lived in a. For some reason, he looks like. He is the youngest of eight children, which not only means that, but. The solution to avoid getting raped by his clearly superior siblings was to do what any bitch would do, and run away from his problems. Due to an addiction to, he has developed a bad case of which forces him to call out 'boink' and 'bonk' all the goddamn time.
Scout also has irrational fear of rainbows, an obvious metaphor for his. He can also most likely due to an addiction to which would explain his speed. Boink!Your average Scout. Tries to shoot at someone, misses, runs away. Will use the Scattergun or the Fag-A-Nature, but can't aim for shit because they run and double-jump non-stop.
Will use the Pistol when his main weapon is out of ammo and spam it without effect, while running backwards and getting stuck in walls. Will run straight in your face while spamming the left and right keys and missing every shot, because that's what they saw in a frag video.
Will use the Bonk! Atomic punch, because without it they'd never be able to reach the Control Point/Intelligence. Will use the Sandman, because they think they'll be able to hit anyone with the baseball. Will run past a Spy about to backstab an enemy combo and alternate hitting each of them with the bat, killing himself and giving away the location of the Spy trying to. Will always taunt after every kill (99℅ of the time its the shaudenfreide taunt).
Your average Soldier. Will use the Direct Shit simply because it does more damage. They'll sometimes resort to the standard Rocket Launcher if they can't aim for shit, or even the Cockmongler 5000 to spam the charge attack and hope it hits.
Will have the Buff Banner equipped but never live long enough to use it. Will use the Equalizer because they think the higher-damage-at-less-health thing has any use outside of melee-only duels. Will chase a Dead-Ringer Spy into a corner and trying to kill him instead of using the shotgun.
A / in a who takes a fuckton of, to the point where he believes he lives in a wondrous land of magic, candy, bright colours, pixies, and all things wonderful. Therefore he is, and you're a retarded cunt if you say otherwise.Your average Pyro. Will use the Backburner and Axtinguisher together, because the conceited cunts think they're skilled enough to switch weapons at the right time. Will use the Flare Gun to pick off enemies weak enough. If you actually die at the hands of one of these,. Never utilizes the airblast. Also will use the Phlogistinator.
Will use the Phlogistinator. Will never extinguish teammates with the airblast and wonder why people are running around him calling for a Medic or for help. Will just rush into a crowd of enemies with the Flamethrower and hope for the best. Will stay at the spawn point doing nothing but Spy-checking. In and around the spawn. What makes me a?, or the Demoman, is the of Team Fortress 2 with a love for all things explosive. As the title suggests, the Demoman's main job is to and ruin everybody's day, but instead he's the first choice of and alike to get easy Dominations by spawncamping the hell out of the enemy with sticky bombs and spamming grenades.
Not only that, but the Demoman has the widest variety of melee weapons out of all the classes and has shields intended for use with them. You can make other players and SPUFs butthurt when you say '. Like, nobody likes him.It has been revealed in concept art that the Demoman was originally envisioned as an Arab suicide bomber who would rush towards the enemy team and blow himself and everyone around him to kingdom come.
This was later changed to be more politically correct.Your average Demoman. Will use the standard Grenade Launcher to spam grenades everywhere and hope for the best. Will use the Stickybomb Launcher or the Scottish Resistance to place sticky bombs at poor strategic places or the enemy's spawn point. Will equip the Frying Pan because of, but will likely never use it. Heavy,.The Heavy, or Mikhail, is an who really, really hates babies. An unlicensed Doctor/closet- that clearly doesn't like the Hippocratic Oath. Secretly addicted to heroin and has a close relationship with the Heavy.
And blood.Your average Medic. Will use the Blutsauger because they think they can aim well enough to heal more damage than they take. Will often resort to the standard Syringe Gun if they realise they can't aim for shit. Will never live long enough to Ubercharge. Will use the Ubersaw because they think they'll hit something with it to increase Uber.
Will heal nothing but Heavies. Will never heal Snipers. Will never heal Spies. Will heal enemy Spies. Will always be the main of some faggot with USI and several unusuals.
Will be the main of a with pink cosmetics. The Sniper., more affectionately known as the, is a Australian-wannabe wanker born in New Zealand according to an official TF2 Comic who lives in a camper van and prefers to. His adopted parents are highly against his and believe him to be. His real parents are from the underwater country of lanky shits called New Zealand who differ greatly from the macho buff Moustachioed Australians by being gangly brainy people. That explains why the sniper doesn't have a moustache, natch.Your average Sniper.
Will use the Sniper Rifle or its reskin, the AWPer Hand, to attempt (and often fail) to farm kills from miles away. Will resort to the Cuntsman spamming arrows if they get bored of standing in one spot getting backstabbed by the same Spy over and over again. Will use the, the Razorback, or a jar of piss. Will have the Tribalman's Shiv. But never use it. Will camp near the spawn. Will try to kill an enemy one mile away with the SMG.
Will attempt to play Spy after being shot to death after using the Razorback as a last resort. Is 1 of 4 common classes that F2Ps will pick. Will make P2Ps butthurt in any Trade server. The Spy can disguise as other players and is a. He fucks and always smokes after sex. Weapons used by all classes Sometime, Valve decided it would be fun to introduce a small collection of melee weapons which functioned in the exact same way as the default melee weapons, essentially making them nothing more than expensive cosmetic reskins. The Spy and the Engineer can't use these reskins except the Saxxy for some reason.: A Gold trophy depicting TF2's very own Australian Chuck Norris, Saxton Hale.
It turns killed enemies into Australium statues.: Originally only used by the Demoman and the Soldier. The only reason you'd want to use it is because the Scout can swing it faster than every other class, which results in In a recent update, they added, which turns into.: A wooden road sign used by Christfags and hippies alike to hit people over the head with when others don't agree with them. The sign can be painted with using the.: A staff with a golden eagle on the top. Yet another promotional weapon awarded for buying the 'Total War Master Collection', a selection of shit games you won't play.:. You can only get it if you get it by chance from a Mann Co.
Crate or buying it from the Mann Co. Either way you have to fork out real for it. Memory Maker: A fucking camera.
Awarded to the sad cunts who submitted their entries to the Second Annual Saxxy Awards and made it to the finals.: A joint of which you hold by the. Awarded in Genuine quality for buying a game nobody cares about.: The ultimate coda to TF2's trading craze.
Introduced in the November 28 Two Shitties update, only available if you earn it after completing the Tour, even then you have a 0.01% chance of earning it. It now takes the cake for the rarest weapon in the game.Hats. Consensus among the player base regarding TF2's hats.Just because they thought TF2 wasn't that gay yet, Valve announced that they would release items that would be given out at random during play, to force and to spend even more time on this fucked up game. After much by the TF2 community, many were that they couldn't get the new unlocks and cried whenever they saw a player with the new item.
Realizing how much can they earn, Valve started releasing of pay-to-get hats, which would happily spend money on instead of buying. For a full list of these hats, go.These are some of the more notable hats in the game which are now 'Retired'; unavailable by crafting, random drops, via the Mann Co. Store or 'Unusual' crafting:. Batter Helmet: Scout's baseball cap because he's a wanna-be Babe Ruth. Soldier's: A 'Nam style helmet with an Ace of Spades and blunts for Soldier to smoke. Pyro's: This name supports Pyro's latin background theory.
Pissed off profags who thought the fan on top of the bean hat could spin. Demoman's Fro: Demoman removes his suburban skull cap to reveal his stereotypical Blaxploitation afro. Football Helmet: Heavy, being the American loving Eastern European he is, has a team-colored football helmet since he was too overweight to be a good football player.
Mining Light: Engineer straps a light to his work hat. Whoop-de-doo. Prussian Pickelhaube: Fun fact,. Trophy Belt: Literally Sniper's default fedora with crocodile teeth. Lame.: And by fedora it's a trilby as Valve was too dumb to differentiate this Spy hat.Trading.
Serious business, you can spend IRL moneys to get virtual items to trade with other people to get moar items to make your e-peen longer. One could also do the OL version of burning money by unboxing crates. There are a number of websites decated to this.
All sites have the.tf suffix, I wonder why. One of the websites that are decated to trading, it is run.
They have this system that try’s to filter out the noobs, and they get really, IE perma-ban instantly, if you tell anyone the secret. Go to their community rules page, scroll down to miscellaneous rules and click the word “here” on the first rule. Non-player characters As TF2 progressed down its path to becoming complete, a number of non-playable characters appeared. Really, Valve doesn't give a shit about any of them except for, who is basically an version of who is slightly less but far more.
One noteworthy about Saxton is that his name is an anagram for hot anal sex. The only other character even worth mentioning is The Announcer/Administrator, who is a bitchy chain-smoking hag that sits in a chair and yells about how much you suck at the game. Ms. Pauling: The Administrator's assisstant and a cock tease of Scout's. Heavy's Family: Heavy has a small Russian lady whose Heavy's mom and three younger sisters who, being brawny Eastern European women, are all about the same size as the gigantic heavy. Also the youngest sister, Zhanna, keeps fucking the RED soldier. The Horseless Headless Horsemann: An instakilling faggot with a fuckload of health, who appears during halloween events, but can be spawned and killed on player-servers to get the achievement at any time of the year anyway and used only on fun servers by server admins to.
If you assisted in killing it for the first time and not die when it's been killed, you get an achievement and get 'haunted metal' to craft one of the two halloween-themed shitty hats. One of hats is a skull and the other is a round hat with a load of Voodoo shit on it.
They're both fuck ugly, nobody likes them and those who do have one, or both of these hats, bought them from the Mann Co. Store and used their Haunted Metal for the axe. But don't get too excited, because the axe is just a reskin of the Eyelander, a shitty weapon nobody uses because it's useless.
You would only craft one for e-peen. Merasmus: A 9000 year old wizard from Hogwarts who's now RED Soldier's butt buddy after getting his ass kicked by the RED team. Monoculus: A shitty -themed arena boss. It's basically a that floats around, raping anyone or anything that gets in the way by shooting out fireballs. This boss isn't as fucking difficult to beat as Mersamus or the Horseless Headless Horsemann, however it can choose to 'leave' or 'return' to or from the game with a message popping up every fucking time it happens. It has been said that this eyeball is the Demoman's missing eye,. If you manage to beat this boss, you get a free shitty hat via the random drop system.
Redmond Mann: One of Zepheniah Mann's sons who hired a bunch of mercenaries to take down his brother, Blutarch Mann to claim territory and total dominance over him. He is the leader of Reliable Excavation Demolition. Blutarch Mann: Zepheniah's second son who leads Builder's League United, and like Redmond, has only one primary goal: to eliminate his brother's army and claim his territory.
The BLU team is often the underdog, hence getting their ass kicked all the time by the RED team. Valve even shows their bias for the RED team in their.
Gray Mann: The third son of Zepheniah Mann, however, unlike his brothers, he did not hire a fuckload of mercenaries to take down his arch rival brothers. Years ago, Gray was kidnapped by an eagle who had mistaken him for food and his two brothers haven't seen him in ages. When he returned, he realized how much he'd missed over the years of being kidnapped, and realized that his brothers were engaged in an ongoing war for land and money. Gray, also wanting to have this land and money that his brothers were fighting over, built an army of robots filled with money and sent them to destroy Blutarch and Redmond and their armies, marking the birthdate of. “This is disgusting, and an to tf2 and the community. Somehow you all think throwing jars of pee is mature? Immaturity is telling.
It's not funny unless you're in fifth grade or a monkey. I'd be embarrassed to have anyone I know seeing me play a game with a jar of pee as a weapon.
It's stupid, juvenile, and, and anyone who doesn't see that is, or so insecure that they want others to think they are one of those three things. I certainly hope valve removes this from the game- or this will be the first update that I am not anxiously waiting to play come Thursday. Valve really really sucked the life out of the update with this unlock./signed„—Mitthrawn, because TF2 is serious business. Crab on crab action.: shortly after the game's release, it was discovered that holding out your Disguise Kit, looking straight up, crouching, and then moving around resulted in the Spy walking in a wonky manner not unlike a. This became an overused meme among unfunny /b/tards. It's not uncommon to see a couple of wannabe-funny tards crabbing around for entire matches while onlookers point fingers and/or guns at them.
Many a documenting their shenanigans has been posted. The phenomenon has also spawned a 'Save the Endangered Spy Crabs' campaign, perhaps to counter the tendency for players who decide to kill Spy Crabs, or to parody the various campaigns employed by to prevent the gathering of vital natural resources. Whatever the case, often participating in the campaign will use their ubers on the Spy Crabs to keep them alive as long as possible. In an update, the Spy gained another taunt for the kit that puts the spy in the spy crab pose and he'll click his kit open and closed like a.: another popular fad on the internets was to make covers of well-known songs using nothing but the scout's 'Bonk!' Sound effects, in a manner not unlike the utilization of. The original Bonk Song was of that theme that plays during games. The Bonk Song, as well as some other unfunny TF2 shit, became extremely popular on and gained more than 100,000 views back when that meant something.
Nowadays people have thankfully forgotten about this rejection of human advancement. Viral Faggotry: valve decided to make different videos of classes comparing cock sizes. They decided to name them the ' videos. Every video is a documentary of a different class and their particular. One of them is about a fucking sandwich.Friendly players “I'm going to play the game by not playing the game!„—Some retard who sucks at Team Fortress 2A friendly player or more commonly referred to as 'a friendly' are TF2 players who have realized that they are far too severely autistic to comprehend a simple FPS game and are completely useless to the rest of their team so they resort to wandering around the map like lost man-children getting into pointless antics with people from the enemy team that are also 'friendlies'. They are usually insecure attention whores that spout annoying shit in chat or obsessively spam their mic to try and be funny but just end up looking like full blown retards instead. Friendlies have recently become quite popular in TF2 games which is a sure sign that people don't really give a fuck about the actual gameplay and are more concerned with making other people pay attention to their unfunny in-game faggotry.An easy way to tell that you're in a game with a friendly is by looking at the chat to see if any tards are flooding it with 'DO NOT KILL ME I AM FRIENDLY' or 'LETS CONGA IN THE CENTER OF MAP DO NOT KILL'.
Or if they're communicating via mic you may hear the faint wheezing of an obese neckbeard behind the ear shattering mic spam of some shitty brony song followed by some dipshit Heavy jumping around aimlessly somewhere on the map (probably wearing a lot of cosmetics). Two things could happen at this point: The rest of the team realizes that there is no chance they are going to win this round of capture the flag with a large percent of their teammates playing around like little kids in special ed class so they succumb to the friendlies and you are left with a huge orgy of autists masturbating over their microphones while thinking about how funny and witty they are for playing the game 'their' way. Or they try to ignore the friendlies and actually play the game which will just lead to the friendlies getting more and more desperate for attention until they somehow get it.If at any point you dare kill a 'friendly player' you will be overcome by a wave of both little kids and full grown men alike all going into autistic fits about how you only killed them because you're a troll and a hater. You are now considered an 'unfriendly' AKA someone who is actually trying to play the game. Almost everyone in the game will harass you until you either grow tired and leave or get votekicked out.
Tf2 The War Eagle Trailer
This is why most people try to avoid killing them but if you do decide to kill one you should try to target them over and over because it is a very effective way of trolling TF2's community of basement dwelling ogres.Some things a friendly might try to say to defend themselves include:'Um excuse me you is interrupting our furry scat RP pls do gay ass video game somewhere else ^.^'you're a dick you didn't even have to kill me im not doing anything to you'I'm playing the game how I want! How do you know this isn't how the game is intended to be played!?' 'lol u must suck at the game if you have to kill friendlies'Go play CoD faggot TF2 isn't mature enough for you'ASjflkdhsgSKG OOGA BOOGA I SMEER SHIT ON FACE NOW U KILL FRIENDLY'If you want to find a friendly in game they are usually located in capture the flag maps and orange/party maps. You can easily find them sitting in the sewer systems of Two Fort moping around like snobby little children who didn't get their way, most likely showing off some stupid taunt or hat that they bought with their jew parent's credit card.Jailbreak “GO TO YELLOW LINE„—Fetus Russian warden cuntJailbreak is a boring as fuck custom gamemode in, not only Team Fortress 2, but a lot of other games as well. You either play as the prisoners, wanting to kill yourself every second you play, or play as the guards, feeling like a fucking god among the other players.The prisoners are the warden's bitch, so have fun playing as a prisoner you cunt. The prisoners have to do every single fucking thing that the warden says, even if it's fucking insane or against the rules.
Don't complain though, because the warden will go on a diaper tantrum and call you a cunt and say you shouldn't be playing jailbreak. As a prisoner, there are multiple boring as fuck minigames that you can play. A boring game that most child Russian wardens force you to play. A game that could be fun if the warden knew how to disable collisions. Same as fall game. A broken game that should be removed but they won't because they're lazy cunts.An easy way to troll people on this gamemode is to go on guards and start killing all the prisoners. This will get all the players pissed off at you 100% of the time, screaming in chat that you're a freekiller and shit like that.
Some faggots might even call an admin, but they won't join because they're lazy cunts who are too busy sucking Valve's dick to get more unusuals for a bigger. The entire server will be against you,.Cheaters Like with most Valve games this one is no exception for cheaters. Some do it for the lulz others do it because they have nothing better to do, however it almost always ends in lulz on massive amount of levels. Reactions from pissed off crybabies very from an autistic comment on the cheaters profile, videos of spot the hacker all the way to community server owners developing such shit anti-cheat plugins that even legit players get shitcanned. Take BlackWonder for instance.Autism in the Cheating SceneIf you thought cheating is just writing code and having fun with an occasional HvH (Hack vs Hack), you better get with the times. Cheating nowadays is flexing with your proud money waste investment of a 100$+ cheat on YouTube videos with dogshit music equivalent to another Gucci Gang ripoff playing in the background. Not to mention making autistic shit flinging matches with other cheaters/cheat developers on who's cheat is better with mental gymnastics included.
It gets so bad some go as far as to start doxxing each other and or dumping source code as a big brained fuck you. Although, some really only give a shit about if their shit works or not.
MP3:10h Version:Whooowee! Would you look at that.The Soldier sings about how much he's better than YOU!
Until Demoman ruins the moment.600 Subscribers Special. Once again, thanks a lot for subscriptions. You're all amazing!Original Song:Lyrics:Mission begins in 10 seconds!5! BEGIN!You are weak! You are bleeders!You are maggot! You are traitors!You run fast; I run faster!You are funny; I am funnier!This kill is mine, this death is yours!This point is mine, this point; not yours!You are failure, hit the shower!Can not burn me!
FIRE!This is MY world! Do you get that?You are nothin' but a maggot!I will kill you! I will eat you!You are weak! You are bleeders!You are, you are, you are, you areYou run, I run, you are, I amThis kill, this death, this point, this pointYou are, hit the, can not, FIRE!-Chorus-You are weak!
You are bleeders!You are maggot! You are traitors!You run fast, I run faster!You are funny, I am funnier!This kill is mine, this death is yours!This point is mine, this point; not yours!You are failure, hit the shower!Can not burn me! FIRE!This is MY world! Do you get that?You are nothin' but a maggot!I will kill you! I will eat you!You are weak! You are bleeders!You are maggot!
You are traitors!You run fast, I run faster!You are funny, I am funnier!Can not burn me! FIRE!Sir, yes, sir! I am a Soldier!
YES!(Repeat x4)Demoman: (Burp)Soldier: Demoman? You are maggot!Demoman: Hey, Private Hair-Cut!Soldier: One-eye cross dresser!Demoman: Go to hell!Soldier: DRUNK!Demoman: DEVIL!Soldier: Englishman with a dress!Demoman: Oi!.What just happened?DOMINATE! I'll be gentle!DOMINATE! Shaggin' your wife!DOMINATE! Big ugly girl!D-DOMINATE! You're all bloody dead!DOMINATE! Eat lead, lads!DOMINATE!
Bloody blockhead!DOMINATE! DOMINATE!Hah heh heh heh.DOMINATE! All ya dandies!DOMINATE!
Thanks for the ride!DOMINATE! Our bloody point!DOMINATE! That will teach 'em!DOMINATE! Gon'ta strangle!DOMINATE! (Falls asleep)What? BLOODY HELL!.Repeat Chorus.Soldier: Boo-Yah!
You deserve a medal!Demo: Ah, nooooo!Soldier: YES! You're like the cyclops of Greek Myth. Except you are Scottish, and I LOVE you!Demo: Ahhhhh love you man.Soldier: You are good son, real good. Maybe even the best.Demo: (Weeping)Soldier: C'mere, cupcake!Spy. You disgust me!Soldier: SPY!Demo: SPY!